It’s 81 degrees outside. I’m sweating in shorts and a tee. This fool has a scarf on. I’m so confused.
Dude just got up and rolled without his shoes. So…fuck shoes I guess?
Yeah, girl. You flush that toilet with your bad self.
For today’s first flight I will be flying with 2004 Bluetooth guy and Google Glass guy who is probably partaking in some gender reversal porno. Both of you, take them off. You look like idiots.
The Puppy Bowl up top has more TD’s than Denver. Hahaha!!
I bank with Chase. But once of twice a month I’m forced into a B of A and have to fight the urge not to take a flame thrower to the whole building.
Here’s to hoping I rolled the dice on the right dates with my bookings… #lifeisbeautiful
Excuse me, sir, would you perhaps like to put the top on your jeep so you don’t look like you’re getting ready to shovel snow when you drive around Las Vegas? No? You don’t? You’re to cool? Ok then, carry on. #douche
The most ridiculous mannequins I’ve even seen in person. #latergram #miamibeach
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